Today, we bought a car. Having been without a car for weeks, relying on our motorbikes, it was cause for celebration. We bounced home. We got there. She was there. Miss Negative. Doom and Gloom. Party pooper. She did not congratulate us. She did not attempt enthusiasm or interest. She focussed on her own woes and paid no interest in our car or the things we got for it. In short, she made it about herself. She is selfish. She harbours jealously. She wants control. She had her own worries; things she wanted to do, which she turned into something big enough to be 'important'. They really weren't. Every effort I made to boast about the car, I was cut short or met with a stare of disinterest.
She ruined our excitement. Better still, she ruined it all day. Then, she belittled my partner - as she always does. She has no partner, she uses mine. I share him, you see. I always have. Inherited her. It was through no fault of my own. He cannot stand up for himself. The relationship has always been like this. She likes it like that.
Right now, she has comandered him to finish building her dog house at her brother's place. This is at a time when we should be celebrating together, spending time together. Instead, I am here on the lounge, watching tv. I am alone, feeling very resentful, wondering why he won't make a stand, figure out what the right thing is and put some limits in place. I suffer, she doesn't.
Don't get me wrong, he's not 'mine'. BUt I 'own' him more than she ought to. She needs her own partner, except I share him with her. He and I have discussed this many times, with no resolution. I don't know what to do. he finds it hard to defend, confrontation is difficult and thinking on his feet is hard.
Now I must sms him, give him an ultimatum for arrivals. I hate this. I am the 'domineering' partner. The one who makes him do things, contrary to what she would prefer, demand even.
I'm tired of this.
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3 comments:
I wrote our Mr Negative a letter. But it was for me to do, and I realise that it would be for Glenn to do, not you. And he has to want to do it. And he has to be prepared to let the friendship die. But no one really wants that, do they?
Since our Mr Negative has been out of our lives, even though I was initally very regretful and upset about it all, I am now very very happy that I don't have to suffer through it any more.
Po is sucking you both dry. It's hardly Glenns fault, but he needs to deal with it. I hope that for your sake he will.
In ways, I wonder if it is Po that is holding you both back from the 'next step'.
Can someone fill me in on who is Po? the name comes up every now and then. What is her relations to Sam and Glen?
Som
Som, hi btw!
Po is a friend of Glen's who I inherited - she was his 'friend' long before I came on the scene. They used to work together and go mountain biking together. Just friends. Po isn't her real name either, just one I made up.
Basically, I think she has issues with having lost her 'control' over him because I am now his priority.
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