It's so hard waiting, wondering.
Doubts and paranoia creep in under the surface.
Personalities turn.
Irritable. Grouchy. Tired. Depressed.
Not many days left.
Ticking away.
Back to the grind soon.
Thursday 23 June 2005
Wednesday 22 June 2005
fragments...
My hands and arms are shaking.
Perhaps because I chopped a huge chunk of garden out today and filled the green bin.
I'm still shaking.
I drink coke.
The house smells burnt.
Another pot plant has bitten the dust.
Thanks Clio.
I'm struggling to stay awake.
I've slept too much already.
I need something to do.
But I have no money.
The house needs cleaning.
I am too tired to do it.
My coughing is being beaten into submission.
Yay antibiotics.
My hands are dry.
I need hand cream.
Oh yeh, I have no money.
Maybe I should go for a drive with Clio?
Maybe I should buy some fuel with the money I don't have - apparently fuel prices are to go up further this week.
I should clean.
I wish the cats would pick up a broom, or wash the dishes.
I think I might try to do the dishes, or sweep/mop the floor.
Or something.
Maybe I could watch that Donnie Darko DVD that I've had for months.
Or sleep?
No.
Stop rambling Sam.
End
Perhaps because I chopped a huge chunk of garden out today and filled the green bin.
I'm still shaking.
I drink coke.
The house smells burnt.
Another pot plant has bitten the dust.
Thanks Clio.
I'm struggling to stay awake.
I've slept too much already.
I need something to do.
But I have no money.
The house needs cleaning.
I am too tired to do it.
My coughing is being beaten into submission.
Yay antibiotics.
My hands are dry.
I need hand cream.
Oh yeh, I have no money.
Maybe I should go for a drive with Clio?
Maybe I should buy some fuel with the money I don't have - apparently fuel prices are to go up further this week.
I should clean.
I wish the cats would pick up a broom, or wash the dishes.
I think I might try to do the dishes, or sweep/mop the floor.
Or something.
Maybe I could watch that Donnie Darko DVD that I've had for months.
Or sleep?
No.
Stop rambling Sam.
End
Tuesday 21 June 2005
Inconceivable and chaos abounds...
This is what I did tonight, in this order:
Now, I sit in front of the TV, after coughing up my guts from the smoke, relieved to have two very alive cats and a house full of undamaged, albiet smoke damaged possessions.
- Prepared a scrumptious dinner of chicken kebabs and cous cous, using the griller. This is noteworthy.
- Prepared to depart for puppy preschool, only to find my 'adorable' puppy had ripped apart another of my pot plants. Her weekly total as of Tuesday night = 3, if you count the gardenia she pulled out of the pot and took to bed with her!
- We attended puppy preschool. Amusingly, the vet nurse announces a bonus prize to the dog who accrues the most Bonus Bones earned from successfully undertaking the activities.
- Amusing and amazingly, because Clio won. She won a 101 dog care book - woo!
- We arrive home with our prize, I get out of the car to open the gate and I hear a beeping sound from inside the house. It takes me all of 5 seconds to click - we left the second batch of kebabs on the griller - the entire place was filled with smoke, the poor cats were traumatised and their lives flashed before my eyes.
Now, I sit in front of the TV, after coughing up my guts from the smoke, relieved to have two very alive cats and a house full of undamaged, albiet smoke damaged possessions.
Another useless update....
I know I have been slack in updating. Truth be told, I don't have much to blog about, or just can't be stuffed right now. What does that say about me? That I can be only stuffed to blog when I am working? Actually, who knows what it means, and really, who cares?
I'm onto my second week of holidays. I return tomorrow week to work and I must say, I am not looking forward to waking up next Wednesday morning and realising reality has hit. I could become depressed about the whole situation really. I just hope this other job comes through, because once you start to dream of a better life etc and you can see it staring you in the face, it is hard to go back to the cold, harsh reality that is my crappy job.
In other news, I have been plagued (literally!) by a persistant cough for the last 4-5 weeks. It has been aggravating, but not enough to go see the doctor. Ok, so it must have been, because I saw the doctor today and explained to him the symptoms. I was all ready for him (someone I had never meet before) to tell me to grow up, go home and drink some cough medicine. Instead, he listened to my breathing, looked at my throat and ears and asked me some family history questions - it was all quite interesting and I felt like he was takiung me seriously - surprise! Anyways, when I told him I had had pneumonia as a kid and was placed in hospital for about a week, he raised his eyebrows and gave me that look that says, "Now, it aaaalll becomes clear!". I was informed that it was either an atypical throat/wind pipe infection or, get this, whooping cough! Apparently people my age and I don't mind admitting, I am 29, are predisposed to whooping cough, despite the fact that we were vaccinated as kids. Apparently we can get it just after our teens because it would appear the vaccination wears off. Which is why teens are now getting a booster shot and I suppose, I never did. So, I am on a nice strong course of antibiotics for the next 5 days. Hurrah! I kinda feel better to know I wasn't just being a wuss!
Clio has been a good puppy the last few days. We took her out yesterday for coffee and hot chips - well, we had coffee and hot chips, she had the pleasure of looking imploringly at every stranger who walked past and giving them that look that says, "Please take me home with you, she doesn't feed me and I am unloved. Ok, well at least pat me??". She had a good time, I think. So, the little girl was plum tuckered out by the time we brought her inside last night. She promptly fell asleep on the floor and as Glen and I were watching TV, she started to make this horrendous noise that kinda sounded like she was having a fit! Hrm. Glen went down to her and put his hand on her head and called her name - to any other normal dog, it would wake them up, she continued until I pushed her really hard and she sat bolt upright in her stupified "I've just woken up" manner, looking confused. It must have been some puppy nightmare! Her legs were kicking out everywhere and she was making weird grunting noises. Gave us a heart attack, considering we are concerned that she is a bit of a faulty dog with all the ills she's had thus far.
Anyways, my little story about her today is this. I came to the door to see Zeus, I guess, talking to her and she had bought him a present - a half eaten piece of fruit which had fallen from one of the trees in our back yard. We are unsure what type of fruit it is and because of this, we have never picked the fruit. Clio had obviously enjoyed the taste, but had decided to give the other half to Zeus. However, I guess Zeus is just not a fruit eater. But he was happy to sit on the other side of the door and talk to her.
Alright. I might go do some long overdue filing, or I might just go play Warcraft!
I'm onto my second week of holidays. I return tomorrow week to work and I must say, I am not looking forward to waking up next Wednesday morning and realising reality has hit. I could become depressed about the whole situation really. I just hope this other job comes through, because once you start to dream of a better life etc and you can see it staring you in the face, it is hard to go back to the cold, harsh reality that is my crappy job.
In other news, I have been plagued (literally!) by a persistant cough for the last 4-5 weeks. It has been aggravating, but not enough to go see the doctor. Ok, so it must have been, because I saw the doctor today and explained to him the symptoms. I was all ready for him (someone I had never meet before) to tell me to grow up, go home and drink some cough medicine. Instead, he listened to my breathing, looked at my throat and ears and asked me some family history questions - it was all quite interesting and I felt like he was takiung me seriously - surprise! Anyways, when I told him I had had pneumonia as a kid and was placed in hospital for about a week, he raised his eyebrows and gave me that look that says, "Now, it aaaalll becomes clear!". I was informed that it was either an atypical throat/wind pipe infection or, get this, whooping cough! Apparently people my age and I don't mind admitting, I am 29, are predisposed to whooping cough, despite the fact that we were vaccinated as kids. Apparently we can get it just after our teens because it would appear the vaccination wears off. Which is why teens are now getting a booster shot and I suppose, I never did. So, I am on a nice strong course of antibiotics for the next 5 days. Hurrah! I kinda feel better to know I wasn't just being a wuss!
Clio has been a good puppy the last few days. We took her out yesterday for coffee and hot chips - well, we had coffee and hot chips, she had the pleasure of looking imploringly at every stranger who walked past and giving them that look that says, "Please take me home with you, she doesn't feed me and I am unloved. Ok, well at least pat me??". She had a good time, I think. So, the little girl was plum tuckered out by the time we brought her inside last night. She promptly fell asleep on the floor and as Glen and I were watching TV, she started to make this horrendous noise that kinda sounded like she was having a fit! Hrm. Glen went down to her and put his hand on her head and called her name - to any other normal dog, it would wake them up, she continued until I pushed her really hard and she sat bolt upright in her stupified "I've just woken up" manner, looking confused. It must have been some puppy nightmare! Her legs were kicking out everywhere and she was making weird grunting noises. Gave us a heart attack, considering we are concerned that she is a bit of a faulty dog with all the ills she's had thus far.
Anyways, my little story about her today is this. I came to the door to see Zeus, I guess, talking to her and she had bought him a present - a half eaten piece of fruit which had fallen from one of the trees in our back yard. We are unsure what type of fruit it is and because of this, we have never picked the fruit. Clio had obviously enjoyed the taste, but had decided to give the other half to Zeus. However, I guess Zeus is just not a fruit eater. But he was happy to sit on the other side of the door and talk to her.
Alright. I might go do some long overdue filing, or I might just go play Warcraft!
Friday 17 June 2005
Perfect job, no money
Hrm. I had an interview today. It was for a fabulous job, local council, community-based position, friendly team, easy-going boss etc. Perfect. Money not so hot, not so hot in fact that it is about half of what I earn now! Amazing huh? I'm seriously considering it.
They asked me a good question, one which really helped me feel good about the role: "How do you balance your personal life with your working life?". I answered, "Well, I probably shouldn't be saying this, but my personal life will always come first." One said, "That is the only answer you should give!!". I was quite relieved to hear it.
So, I should probably get a seond interview for next week, which will be nice. They sort of indicated I would, which was nice. I felt really relaxed throughout the entire interview and even made them laugh, weird huh?
Fingers crossed. I wonder if I can squeeze a little more money out of them to make life easier for me? What do you think, considering it's a government job with bands / levels etc???
Ok, I must now throw myself on the lounge and relax - it has been an especially hectic week!!
They asked me a good question, one which really helped me feel good about the role: "How do you balance your personal life with your working life?". I answered, "Well, I probably shouldn't be saying this, but my personal life will always come first." One said, "That is the only answer you should give!!". I was quite relieved to hear it.
So, I should probably get a seond interview for next week, which will be nice. They sort of indicated I would, which was nice. I felt really relaxed throughout the entire interview and even made them laugh, weird huh?
Fingers crossed. I wonder if I can squeeze a little more money out of them to make life easier for me? What do you think, considering it's a government job with bands / levels etc???
Ok, I must now throw myself on the lounge and relax - it has been an especially hectic week!!
Tuesday 14 June 2005
Detox
You know, I've been feeling really shit emotionally the last few weeks, but it also means I've been feeling terrible physically and as far as diet goes. I've been eating crap. Drinking coca cola, lemonade, ginger beer (a personal favourite), whatever isn't nailed down, I've been drinking it. And it doesn't stop htere, I've been consuming vast amounts of double coated tim tams! Yes, they are my favourite, closely followed by ANYTHING which has a scerrick of chocolate on it! I swear, I've had the worst sweet tooth and my body has been paying for it! I've been jittery, pimply, bloated, grumpy and a general 'breath of fresh air' - NOT, to be around!
So, I'm taking matters into my own hands whilst on leave and hoping that by outing myself on my diary, I actually stay committed to this 10 day detox thing I've got going here. It's a reputable program, so I have no qualms doing it, but I just went to the fridge and there's bloody lemonade, cadbury's chocolate and bloody violet crumble in abundance - I didn't even make a dint in it last night when I sat for my final binge on it! Dammit!!
Now, I have to stuff my face with hommus on corn cakes, almonds, or worst still - ALMONDS! Hrm, actually, they are tasty, but it doesnt compare to chocolate. I'm just trying to resist the urge to curl up in bed and sleep the day away! That way, I've achieved one day on this detox diet and I'll only have 9 more to go! EEEK!
Wish me luck.
So, I'm taking matters into my own hands whilst on leave and hoping that by outing myself on my diary, I actually stay committed to this 10 day detox thing I've got going here. It's a reputable program, so I have no qualms doing it, but I just went to the fridge and there's bloody lemonade, cadbury's chocolate and bloody violet crumble in abundance - I didn't even make a dint in it last night when I sat for my final binge on it! Dammit!!
Now, I have to stuff my face with hommus on corn cakes, almonds, or worst still - ALMONDS! Hrm, actually, they are tasty, but it doesnt compare to chocolate. I'm just trying to resist the urge to curl up in bed and sleep the day away! That way, I've achieved one day on this detox diet and I'll only have 9 more to go! EEEK!
Wish me luck.
Monday 13 June 2005
It's been a long time...
Sorry for the lack of entries. I just haven't been in the mood, but with a little tlc, rest and relaxation, I almost feel normal again. I don't really want to go through what's up, but it's about work, long hours and abuse. So, I'm looking to get the hell out of dodge, as they say. I'll keep you updated on the progress of this.
But, while I've been gone, I see another blogger has bit the dust. Verbsy was an everyday read for me. Not that he wrote everyday, but it would be with great anticipation that I would log onto his site to see if something new was posted. Alas, I feel he needs some time and maybe he'll come back?
Clio is settling in well. I will post some more photos on flickr shortly. I think I downloaded some the other day, so please have a look, ok? She is such a confident and outgoing animal. We went to our first session of puppy preschool last week and tomorrow evening will be her second session. She will definitely pass with flying colours, now sitting when asked and responding well to other directions. She's very keen to please and picks up new concepts very quickly.
Our new CRV is going back to Honda tomorrow. The bloody thing clunks when we hit bumps or the car decelerates. Let me tell you, if they don't fix it tomorrow, then I'm going to be so in their faces. I really dont think that a car should be sold with that sort of problem, which I might add, "is not a safety issue!!", let alone selling a NEW car to someone in that condition. It has ruined the new car experience for us, a little.
Anyways, I have two weeks off work - hurrah! Job hunting, sleeping and shopping time for me :) I might be more inclined to write some journal entries, if you are lucky :)
But, while I've been gone, I see another blogger has bit the dust. Verbsy was an everyday read for me. Not that he wrote everyday, but it would be with great anticipation that I would log onto his site to see if something new was posted. Alas, I feel he needs some time and maybe he'll come back?
Clio is settling in well. I will post some more photos on flickr shortly. I think I downloaded some the other day, so please have a look, ok? She is such a confident and outgoing animal. We went to our first session of puppy preschool last week and tomorrow evening will be her second session. She will definitely pass with flying colours, now sitting when asked and responding well to other directions. She's very keen to please and picks up new concepts very quickly.
Our new CRV is going back to Honda tomorrow. The bloody thing clunks when we hit bumps or the car decelerates. Let me tell you, if they don't fix it tomorrow, then I'm going to be so in their faces. I really dont think that a car should be sold with that sort of problem, which I might add, "is not a safety issue!!", let alone selling a NEW car to someone in that condition. It has ruined the new car experience for us, a little.
Anyways, I have two weeks off work - hurrah! Job hunting, sleeping and shopping time for me :) I might be more inclined to write some journal entries, if you are lucky :)
Monday 6 June 2005
Hiatus...
Sorry guys, it's been a hectic couple of weeks for me. I've had to do a lot of overtime, endure a lot of shit from my boss and deal with a crap job.
Sorry for the honesty, but you can understand why I haven't been around. Forgive me.
I'll be back shortly.
Sorry for the honesty, but you can understand why I haven't been around. Forgive me.
I'll be back shortly.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)